ad astra per aspera

I walked around campus in the moonlight after finishing my Chem test.  Headed towards the pond in an attempt to find space without the noises of people but there was no escape.  I could feel myself relaxing a little bit in the dark and the noises of night.  I remembered living on King’s Row in 6th grade and crawling out my window after midnight to walk around the empty streets, crouching and hiding whenever cars approached.  I think I felt safer in the streets than I did at home.
I thought about a different life, the possibility of finding happiness in a different context, not in school, not everything being so fucking hard.  I thought about the story of a different life in some small New Mexican town that I told Chris like a fairytale, like a promised dream while the immature lymphocytes slowly killed him.