The fog has rolled in again this week. I’m fighting thru it to try and focus on physics, calculus, digital logic design. So far not very much luck. Oh and the 2 scholarship apps I need to complete, the lab report.
Monday I have 2 homework assignments due, Tuesday a lab report due, Wednesday 2 more homework assignments due and a physics test, thursday another homework assignment due.
And so far I just really don’t fucking care, it’s too thick inside my head and I’m too quickly unraveled and trying to figure out who the fuck I am, again.
I’m a widow? My husband has been dead a year and 4 days? Those last two sentences really describe me? Really? Fuck.
I keep writing lists about my schoolwork in hopes it will spur me into action. But all I want to do is crawl back into bed and stare and cry and then get up and wander aimlessly around this duplex, around my brain. The days have blurred together, food has no taste, sleep gives me no rest.
I’m hoping that class on Monday, that getting back into the routine, will push out the fog.
I want him back I want him back I want him back I want him back I want him back I want him back I want him back I want him back.
please
ad astra per aspera 