ad astra per aspera

Today was harder than I thought it would be.
Maybe because I was up during the night with Magnus and his fever and it brought back painful memories of the many, many times I had to do that with Chris.
I feel like I’m out to sea today.
I miss him so fucking much.
I feel so alone.
I hung up his heavy white robe on the back of my bedroom door when we moved in.
I hug it and cry.