The day started out ok.
- Notify nearly all the people who are sending medical bills that Chris is dead.
- Reserve Uhaul & loading help here in Austin for June 2nd
- Go to my counseling session & Jerald helps me work on how to phrase the move to D&M. Even tho these people have been fucking dicks and piss me the fuck off they are Magnus’ grandparents and he is going to miss them. Mary did take care of him for 8 months. They have let me stay in their home. So to make it easier I figured at dinner I would say “thank you” for all that shit.
- Leave counseling, call Mary & invite her and Dennis out to dinner. She seems unsure, that Dennis is having stomach problems but she will ask. I tell her I have been thinking about plans for Magnus and I and wanted to tell them.
- Go back to Georgetown library and fax copies of Chris’ death certificate to those that requested it.
- Go back to D&M. Magnus is asleep so I wake him up & he is happy to see me of course. Mary tells me her mom is back in the hospital and I tell her I understand if she wants to be near a phone instead of going out to eat. I figured we’d eat together at the table and I can just tell them here. I want to tell them so I can tell Magnus & he can talk freely about it. Magnus wants to ride his bike so we go outside and when I come back in it appears that D&M have already eaten in front of the tv.
- Magnus has a fit about helping Mary vacuum. I heat up some soup for Magnus. He then has a fit about wanting chocolate milk and dessert with no dinner. He re-groups after I take him to the bedroom and goes back to eat.
- This whole time they are watching TV and Dennis hasn’t said a word to me since I got back. Mary doesn’t ask one word about me telling her I wanted to talk to them about our plans.
I’m pissed the fuck off. These dicks can’t be fucking bothered. I’m trying to fucking include them in knowing our plans because that will be good for my fucking son to have there be some sort of communication and preparation between all of us but fuck it. Magnus and I are visiting Houston tomorrow and I will tell Mary we are moving to Kansas before we hit the road.
I’m tired and pissed off and I miss having any sense of fucking privacy. Magnus has to use the bathroom with me and shower with me and this morning when I took a shower without him and made a point of telling Mary what I was doing so she could watch him she acts like she comprehends my request but when I’m in the bathroom with the door locked Magnus is trying to get in and asking for me and she’s in the next room just sitting at the dinner table listening to him and not coming to help out at ALL. I’m telling him thru the door that I’ll be done soon and to go find grandma and she doesn’t come to distract him AT ALL.
Soon, soon, so fucking soon we will be leaving this fucking place. I’m not going to tell Mary and specific dates because I wouldn’t put it past her to plan some fucking sneak attack visit from Brenda, since she knows I’m not talking to Brenda anymore. I know that Brenda has told her I don’t talk to her and Mary doesn’t say shit to me, she just makes a point of talking to me about Brenda at least once a day.
I’M SO FUCKING OVER THESE FUCKING PEOPLE.
FUCK.
ad astra per aspera 